Living In The Present

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James 4:14 

Yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes.

16 April 2020, 11h55, France

Today marks the 30th day of my confinement in France.

Here are some photos I took since the beginning of my confinement.

I started this blog to spread positive vibes to anyone who’s willing to read it. The epidemie that’s happening around the world is sad, horrible, scary, difficult, and most of all lonely. A lot of people are dying alone, without their loved ones beside them. I never imagined how life is making us turn and in the end, because of a virus we can possibly die alone.

Be thankful.

I’m so thankful I’m still alive, eating and has a roof over my head. I’m thankful I have the means to buy the things I need and doesn’t have to be so problematic what to eat the next day. I’m thankful for all the equipment I have and connections to all the people I love. Talking to each one of them is a blessing. Seeing their faces still alive, breathing and laughing is a miracle. I am thankful for all the applications I can play, use to make creative stuff and watch and read to pass the day and lessen the boredom. I’m thankful for all the recipes that I’m trying to follow to nourish my body and be strong. I’m thankful I have a partner I can annoy all day and talk to. I’m thankful to everything that is happening to me. When I see, look and hear what the other people are experiencing I’m thankful I’m so lucky but humanity is going down.

It’s okay that you are not okay…

Being confined is not really okay. All will be limited and some will certainly just have to stop. There are things, people, situations, words, feelings that we’ll hate. But we cannot do anything about it, we have to live with it for a moment. It’s okay not to be okay, share it or don’t, it’s okay. We are born with feelings, we cannot control ourselves sometimes but don’t forget we always have a choice to be positive and go to the next step and deal with it. In a world with a system that is not in favor for most of us, we need to be more stronger than them. We cannot stay this way and just blame. We need to raise our voices in a way they will listen. There are lots of intelligent people but not heard. There are lots of kind people but not recognized. I think there is a problem of whom and what people like to talk about. I observed that all news are in favor of the system. Why can’t we have the democratic side of the world? I don’t understand why people like or choose to see the bad side always. The media has the power but they are locking themselves to the system that is not helping.

I pray…

The world is getting darker and darker because of the negative thoughts, hatred, violence, and sins. At certain point I don’t know what to believe in anymore. But I believe in humanity. I am praying that one day people will wake up to be simple, and sensitive to each other. Waking up with confidence and humility in each and everyone’s hearts. Seeing the future with clear visions without corruption. I pray that people will care for each other more with sincerity. I’m 34 years old without a child because I don’t know if it’s worthy to bring up another human only to suffer because of the system. I’m praying for leaders to have a stand on humanity, and equality. It’s 2020 and we are living still with hypocrisy.

For every seed that is planted, it will create life. I’m hoping for better things to happen and in times like this, I hope I’m helping someone to reflect on things that we need to improve. Even if it arrived like this, I think it’s a restart button. Now we can see more clearly where the problems are, what to adjust and where we should focus. Even if the world is teaching us in a hard way, it’s better to be grateful for things that we are capable of and what we have for the moment.

D29 of my confinement:

I woke up at 6h30.

Blinded by the sunlight as it fills our crib.

Silence broken by the sound of the fridge.

I cannot blame people who cannot let go of the past

and others who’s future is bright as the sun,

because living in the present is difficult as it sounds.

-Joanpelrod